The writing genre of responding to international achievement reports in education

I’d like to start by saying that I’m a nice person, not like all those other nasty commentators, by proposing something small and manageable. I just want to highlight that I’m not part of the feeding frenzy created by this latest report.

I’d like to begin by establishing my credentials as someone who cares. I will do this by talking about disadvantaged students identified by this study.  I will do this using devices such as the socioeconomic gradient, and how certain groups are overrepresented in some band or other.  By doing this, you will know I care, and that I’m looking out for the little person, whoever they may be.  I will also be using statistics which establishes my smartness and that I know about these things.

At this point I’m generally out of ideas. But everybody knows that education has teachers as well people teaching those teachers, so I’ll just have a crack at all of them.

It’s good to pick on teachers. School buildings, curriculum, school location and the like are pretty boring. So I’ll avoid them.  I also have no idea how to implement anything, teachers do this right? I don’t understand systems, system managers, public policy and industry structure – that’s for boffins. While I talk at the system-level, I don’t really know what system-level means. Lucky I care so I don’t have to talk like a manager.

Then I’ll drag up some good idea from the past that has faded. I will present them as my own new idea. Or I’ll promote something that will benefit my company or my friend’s company. Maybe something about phonics, assessment, methods of instruction, or just something plain old zany like ‘teach like bushranger’.

I will blame the inertia in the system on all those bad people. You might know them as those other people, those ‘post’ people responsible for post-truth. Whenever I can’t explain myself I will blame teachers and other bad people.

I will finish with a platitude, perhaps a need to look more at the data. Teachers should manage the change though; they get 3 days of professional development per year right? That should do it! Those bad teachers (not the teachers that are reading this, they are good teachers, those other teachers are bad).

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